Bob Hope was a famous comedian well known for his funny one-liners. Born in 19th Century, he made laugh out loud for decades with his hilarious jokes on Hollywood, politics, and daily life. Moreover, his humor contains clever, playful, and generally filled with fun with himself or the world around him. Even today also, people like to her the Bob Hope’s style on finding joy with big and small wins. Relating to which, this write-up includes all original quotes that were made on his spirit and categorized in 3 funny themes. So, whether you are a fan of old-school comedy or just here for giggle, this collection of quotes keeps Bob Hope’s wisdom alive. Likewise, feel free to read the quotes on Abby Lee.
Hollywood Humor – Bob Hope Quotes Style
Bob Hope loved joking about Hollywood’s glitz and tumult. And these are original quotes in the spirit of cool and crazy movie magic.
- “I asked for a big role. They gave me a part as a boulder.”
- “My last film sank. Down with the fish, two fins.”
- “They told me I’d stand out on the screen. I think they meant sweating.”
- “‘I wanted drama,’ is what I said. Instead, I got a script about doing laundry.”
- “My co-star was a parrot. That darn bird forgot its lines too!”
- “I must say, in Hollywood, my mirror is most unkind.”
- “I auditioned for a hero. They cast me as the cape.”
- “I’m going to be a star, they said. I got a star on my dressing room door.”
- “My movies cratered so badly, no one ever got to see the ending credit.”
- “Hollywood’s hard work; my ego’s on a diet.”
- “The movie stink. Even the trailers were running backward.”
- “They shouted cut, and I thought they meant cutter to my paycheck.”
- “They told me I’d steal the show. Instead, I took the popcorn back home!”
- “My big break? Well, the set broke down while they were shooting mine.”
- “I requested romance, and they put me together with a lamp.”
- “Hollywood is crazy about me. My shadow gets fan mail.”
- “I tried method acting for real – I am still lost in character.”
- “My picture bombed. Not even the trailer went forward.”
- “Now that’s a wrap, I said. For lunch.”
- “I wanted fame; they gave me a name badge.”
- “I had to play a king. My crown was made of plastic.”
- “I heard I would shine; I actually just blinded the crew.”
- “My stunt double quit I put him off quitting.”
- “Hollywood’s hard work; my ego’s on a diet.”
Political Punchlines – Inspired by Bob Hope Quotes
Affectingly mocking you with a grin, Bob Hope would often poke fun at politicians. These quotes, naturally, give his cheeky slant on power and promises.
- “Politicians give you promises like moons, and I bought only a flashlight.”
- “That vote counted until the recount forgot me.”
- “Free country, they say. Fees sold separately.”
- “I ran for office. Tripped over my speech.”
- “Politicians speak in circles. I’m getting dizzy already.”
- “They fixed the roads-but added more potholes.”
- “I wanted straight talk. They curved me the truth.”
- “Election was really close. Wallet is closer.”
- “They promised jobs—and I got this paper hat.”
- “I always say that politics is a game. I really am bad at it—at checkers.”
- “They built a bridge through nowhere fun.”
- “My senator is transparent, I can see through his suit.”
- “I voted for change, and got coins instead.”
- “Politicians adore hot air. They should drift away.”
- “They said it’s a new day. Same bills old style.”
- “I want action, and they gave me a meeting.”
- “It was loud campaign. My ears left.”
- “Gold was promised; instead I got a goldfish.”
- “Politics is messy. I ran out of napkins.”
- “I sought hope-now a slogan was sent to me.”
- “They fixed the system, with duct tape.”
- “My vote’s a whisper in a shouting match.”
- “Politicians juggle promises. They dropped mine.”
- “They said trust us; my dog growled.”
- “The debate got hot and I had popcorn.”
- “I asked for a hero, and they sent a Mascot.”
- “Politics is a circus. I’m the clown.”
Everyday Wit – Bob Hope Quotes Reimagined
Bob Hope turned all the little unpleasant moments of life into hell-for-leather comedy. Indeed, these sophisticated quotes are mixed with Bob’s comedic qualities.
- “I tried jogging. My couch cheered me back.”
- “I cooked dinner. The smoke alarm applauded.”
- “I wanted coffee. Spilled it onto my dreams.”
- “My dog is my boss. He does all the barking.”
- “I had a diet all planned. I ended up eating the plan.”
- “I lost my keys. They are certainly hiding somewhere with my socks.”
- “I tried yoga. Now I am a pretzel.”
- “I cleaned my house. The house fought back.”
- “I set the alarm. I slept right through the encore.”
- “I saved some money. I spent it on a sale.”
- “I wanted peace. The kids brought drums.”
- “I fixed the sink. It now sings.”
- “I tried gardening. Grew an empire of dandelions.”
- “I took my dog for a walk. He took me for a walk.”
- “I ran after the bus. It waved goodbye.”
- “I bought a lamp. It turns brighter than me.”
- “I tried a nap. The phone said no.”
- “I wanted adventure. I took the wrong exit.”
- “I made a list. I forgot where I put it.”
- “I was dancing by myself. The mirror laughed.”
- “I fixed my hair. The wind said try again.”
- “I tried getting up early. The sun got me beat.”
- “I baked a cake. It is now being used as a frisbee.”
- “I wanted some peace. The fridge hummed louder.”
- “I lost my phone. I found it in my hand.”
- “I tried running. My shoes called it quits first.”
- “I bought a clock. Time still disrespects me.”
- “I painted a wall. Now I’m a wall mural.”
- “I tried singing. Then the cat moved out.”
- “I wanted calm. Life gave me chaos.”
Final Thoughts
These 70+ quotes celebrate Bob Hope’s natural ability to turn problems in life into a dose of laughter. Further, the list ranges from funny Hollywood stories through the political glitzy promises to everyday incidental happenings of life. In addition, it is extended into three fun themes, these quotes show comedy, that reflects a connecting forces within us.
